Mom Taught Me
My mother taught me TO APPRECIATE A JOB WELL DONE.
“If you’re going to kill each other, do it outside. I just finished cleaning.”
My mother taught me RELIGION.
“You better pray that will come out of the carpet.”
My mother taught me about TIME TRAVEL.
“If you don’t straighten up, I’m going to knock you into the middle of next week!”
My mother taught me LOGIC.
“Because I said so, that’s why.”
My mother taught me MORE LOGIC.
“If you fall out of that swing and break your neck, you’re not going to the store with me.”
My mother taught me FORESIGHT.
“Make sure you wear clean underwear in case you’re in an accident.”
My mother taught me IRONY.
“Keep crying, and I’ll give you something to cry about!”
My mother taught me about the science of OSMOSIS.
“Shut your mouth and eat your supper.”
My mother taught me about CONTORTIONISTS.
“Will you look at that dirt on the back of your neck!”
My mother taught me about STAMINA.
“You’ll sit there until all that spinach is gone.”
My mother taught me about WEATHER.
“This room of yours looks as if a tornado went through it.”
My mother taught me about HYPOCRISY.
“If I told you once, I’ve told you a million times, don’t exaggerate!”
My mother taught me the CIRCLE OF LIFE.
“I brought you into this world, and I can take you out..”
My mother taught me about BEHAVIOR MODIFICATION.
“Stop acting like your father!”
I hope you enjoyed this story about MOM as much as I have..... Explore the MS&D archives for over 1000 additional stories... Take Care and God Bless :-) Kenny T
Author Unknown - Please comment if you know the author so credit can be given
My Mom also taught me about forgiveness, appreciation, and unconditional love!
Cheers
Jim
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A fun end to my day. THANKS!
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My Mom said she used to say some of those things to my brother, Andrew…for real!
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I laughed at these because my Mom used quite a few. Lol
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That was both humorous and strangely comforting, knowing all mothers use these anyways 😀
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Reblogged this on quirkywritingcorner and commented:
I probably posted this the first time it came around, but it’s worth a repeat. ~ Connie
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My mom used quite a few of these, AND she taught me “Patience, Pluck, and Perseverance”. Wonder what we’re teaching our children 🙂 in
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I think the author may be a sibling of mine; we must have had the same mother!
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Pingback: Happy (Mishmash) Tuesdays- Episode 2 – Tendrils
My mom first taught me first about faith
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