Approximately 15 years ago I was at a friend’s wedding and during the speeches at the reception, the groom was thanking his parents for their love and patience. His emotions got the better of him and tears began to freely flow.
Some at the wedding thought it showed a weakness in Warren. As for me, these words came to my mind (I don’t know if I created this saying or if I heard it from somewhere else), and I am reminded of them everytime tears well up in my eyes: “Tears do not a man belittle – but rather a man they make.”
Women just seem to naturally know how to cry. Their emotions are stirred reading a book, watching a movie, grieving with a friend, experiencing the pain their children experience.
Men have a long way to go in learning, and I hesitate to use it, about their “soft side”. We have been taught by our fathers that tears are a sign of weakness, “Grown men don’t cry”. Instead, we should be teaching our children that tears are a sign that we have enough confidence in ourselves to be ourselves.
To be able to laugh so hard that tears run down your face is to experience true joy. To be able to look up to a Heavenly Father with tears streaming down our face and say “Thank-you for forgiving me” is to understand true forgiveness. To stand at a grave side with uncontrolled tears is to say that you loved someone and you are truly going to miss them.
Can a man really be complete if he suppresses the urge to shed tears, to show his soft side? You have to decide that for yourself.
--- Copyright © 2000 Brian McKay --- Manitoba, Canada